birds

Gabe doesn't worry about anything
As many of you know, we are coming to town! Corvallis that is. We've talked about it since about two minutes after we bought our house in Independence. (Whoops) I don't regret us buying our home, it has been just that for almost three years, and it's been wonderful.
Soon, though, we will say goodbye to our "American dream" home but be so glad to exchange it for the loss of a 35 minute drive nearly everyday, a gift of time, community and gas money. We will be glad to rid ourselves of the 99 commute for so many reasons.
I am in a reflective mood, because I think we made a good decision last night, something Josh and I seem to struggle through sometimes.
When we bought our house, we thought about living in Corvallis, but there were literally 5 houses on the market under 200K. Josh was working in Monmouth so our decision made some sense, but to be honest, we picked our house because it was big-shiny-and new. Much different than the houses just above our price range in Corvallis.
We try really hard to listen to God, often we agonize over what he would have us to do. (like we have the past couple of days). We want so badly to do his will. But we are emotional people and it is often difficult for us to hear God over our passionate feelings and desires!
The past couple of days we've been agonizing ourselves again, trying to make a decision about where to live. We found a house that makes sense; its not too shabby, lots of room, nice backyard, room for chickens a garden and fruit trees. A play room! and an open floor plan, in the school district we like and 800 yards from the football stadium!!!! But we feel yucky about it, like a black cloud is hovering above a "yes we'll take it" and we don't know why.
We've gone back and forth, we said a total no on Friday and then applied for it yesterday, then went back to a definite no last night. (after looking at it again and liking it more) AHHH! This stinks! We've sought advice and opinions and every single person has said- if you feel weird say no! And we know they're right. So now we have peace, really we do. I still so badly want to know where we will call home, but I feel better, the stomach ache I've had for a week is gone.
And I feel good and excited trusting God, knowing something better or at least right will come along. (well I go back and forth between that feeling and oh crap where are we gonna live.)
But I'm holding firm to faith. We don't know where the heck we're going to live, but we know God cares. I haven't gotten to listen to the sermon from Dox this past Sunday yet, but Josh said the main point was not to worry, have faith!
"Look at the birds. They don't plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly father feeds them. And aren't you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?...........................Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. "
From Matthew 6