the latest...

So I know, wow, all I do is blog. But the past two days I've been completely locked up in my house, Josh has had to work late, and Grace and I have been having a rough go. We're doing much better now. To fill you in from lunch time yesterday; I put a diaper on Grace hoping she could finally relax and just do her thing. We ate an early lunch and she almost fell asleep at the table at like 11:30! (Normal nap time is 1:00) She slept for 3 full hours and I rested too, we both really needed it. I decided to wash my hands of the morning. If she asks to go on the potty, which later she did--with no results, I will let her go but that's it for a little while. I've kind of had this all or nothing mentallity about potty training, I do better with change this way, but that might not be what she needs. Anyways, we'll see. So she was back to her happy self, giving me lots of hugs and we went to the park and had fun. It may sounds silly but it felt so good to know that I hadn't completely ruined our relationship that morning, I was able to sigh with relief to know she still loved me!! (I know that's crazy but I felt really bad about the morning)
So we got back from the park and were upstairs folding clothes when (and this is after a snack)
she started throwing up!!! Oh what a day!!! She was sick several times throughout the evening. And the hardest part about this day was that I didn't really have any of my normal comforts to make me feel better about my day, or happier or whatever. Josh had a really busy day and had to do a work thing in the evening so he didn't get home till about 8:30, my mom had stuff going on and I couldn't really talk to her. I had finished my book so I didn't have anything to take my mind off my day, I couldn't eat chocolate and I couldn't watch TV because Grace watched cartoons all afternoon because she was sick. And as hard as it was and as much as I cried and felt alone, and wished that Josh was home, or I could eat the chocolate ice cream bar in the fridge, I really realized how much I don't rely on God or look to him for comfort. This is kind of what we are looking at for lent, taking away some of our comforts and seeking God instead. And while I knew I wasn't perfect, yesterday was like a wake up call to how much I really avoid God on a bad day. By 7:00 I was tired, had puffy eyes, was lonely and well just bored watching cartoons. So with having NOTHING else to possibly do I FINALLY opened my bible. But it took having no other options to get there. Anyways, all in all it was a good lesson. God wants to be all the things that I look for in other people or food or entertainment or whatever. And he's much better at being what I need too! I don't think it's bad to find a little comfort in a friend or spouse or even some ice cream, and I will probably always be that way a little. But they are not constant like God is, and can't ultimately comfort me or bring me Joy like God can, so I need to look to him first.
Pee, to poop, to puke to God. what a day!